Wimps and Sooks Cause All The World’s Problems
November 29th 2007 12:26
I had an interesting conversation with someone the other day. They were explaining their opposition to foreign students on campus. They were not the sort of person I regarded a racist by any stretch of the imagination, so I continued to discuss the matter.
I asked what these students had done to them in response to her being herself. She said that they hadn’t so much done anything to her. However, she felt bad for offending them when she acted herself, or spoke loudly about culturally sensitive issues.
This is where I said that she didn’t have to feel bad about offending people simply for existing and being herself. And she said ‘yes she did’, because she didn’t like making people feel bad.
The interesting thing here is that this individual was not turned against international students because of any underlying Xenophobia. She was simply uncomfortable with those of the group who made her feel bad about her own national identity.
Now I don’t mean to simply have a go at her and call her a wimp, or a sook. That’s not true, and not helpful. What I mean to point out is that sometimes an anger at a group of people may just be a tool of self preservation for our own feelings.
Let’s look at Muslims. They, at least as we widely perceive them, don’t like a whole lot of skin being flashed around. They don’t seem to be too flash on Allah jokes or cartoons. They don’t like pig flesh being eaten. Or drinking of alcohol.
One can imagine the feelings of a straight talking, beer guzzling, snag munching, bikini wearing, piss taking Aussie Sheila, who doesn’t like to offend others. It’s not that she hates Muslims – but rather she hates to be hated by Muslims, and does not like to publicly flaunt what may be considered offensive in front of them. It is not real Muslims she opposes – but the way in which her (sometimes accurate) view of Muslims creates feelings of guilt and shame for expressing her own independent cultural identity.
In the end, I would really have to say this; you should never feel as though you should need to change who you are, or feel bad about who you are to appease others. Live and let live only works if we not only let others be as they are – but reserve that right for ourselves, instead of getting caught up in the nasty cycle of guilt and blame.
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